“Thank you”, “Hello”, “Give me… please” and some other phrases and words are among a few words that foreigners just in Korea learn and included in this is usually the phrase chingu , translated loosely as “friend”. Foreigners splice this term to their sentences that are english hesitation and employ it seemingly without understanding just what it means. That is probably certainly one of my least words that are favorite Korean and I’ll explain why.
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Some years back, I was using Korean classes four times per week for four hours every day. I happened to be devouring the maximum amount of because I was dating a Korean man, most of my friends were Korean and of course I was living in Korea and I wanted to make life just a bit easier as I could of the language. Before you take the classes, I happened to be hesitant and weary of the things I regarded as forced respect inside the rules for the language, components of the language that force us to show a respect that we may not need for somebody. Simply because folks are older doesn’t mean they always deserve respect and also at that point I’d held it’s place in enough situations to understand that a number of, usually, guys simply assumed that i ought to be respectful of these and even though they disrespected me personally in several means. Through the classes, I discovered just how to show my disapproval when being disrespected without being downright rude and I also learned how exactly to be much more assertive in Korean. One of the primary lessons we discovered, but, had been that We have almost no “friends” in Korea. (From here on out “friend” in parenthesis would be the Korean as a type of buddy while a friend that is freestanding function as the English variation.)
My better half, boyfriend during the time, and I also chose to have a get together at the house and invited our close friends that are korean. There were about 10 of us round the dining table and I also ended up being the only foreigner in the area. Only at that point, I’d known my boyfriend and all sorts of of his buddies for a great 4 or 5 years plus in my native tongue, I would call them my buddies. After the food was completed as well as the dishes found, I thought a game will be enjoyable. Using what I’d learned from class on the best way to call someone by title, we said, “So-yung-a, do you wish to play a casino game?” with the lower form of the language. I experienced been gaining confidence with the language and deploying it whenever i possibly could. There was clearly an audible gasp and after a matter of seconds of silence, So-yung said, “yes,” but two for the more aggressively conservative people in the team told me i really couldn’t say “So-yung-a” to So-yung.
Buddy 1: So-yung is avove the age of you may be.
Friend 2: You can’t say “So-yung-a” because you’re younger than this woman is.
Me personally: We’re friends though.
Friend 1: No, you’re not friends with So-yung.
Me: What would you mean? I’ve known her for many years. She is had by me contact number during my phone. She is seen by me a whole lot. We have been buddies and my book says this is certainly an appropriate ending for a buddy.
Buddy 2: No, you can’t be friends because this woman is avove the age of you might be.
Me: I don’t know very well what you’re saying.
Friend 1: you are able to simply be friends with someone this is the exact same age as yourself.
Me personally: Well, that doesn’t make any feeling. You may be all my friends and you’re all over the age of i will be.
Friend 1: We aren’t your pals.
After that we decided to go to my room for only a little cry mostly because I became just told I experienced no friends and in addition as the language these people were using to state their standpoint had been really aggressive and I also don’t handle aggressive situations perfectly. Originating from a training viewpoint, aggressively attacking a student for making use of a term or a phrase inappropriately hardly ever helps make the pupil respond in a way that is positive. Usually, the learning student will become more timid to make use of the language or you will need to use terms later on unless they’re completely clear on their meaning. In addition reminded my “friends” later on that I don’t attack them if they misuse a word, if it is excessively rude, I remind myself so it’s not their first language and I also attempt to help them realize why maybe it’s taken the wrong method. My “friends” nevertheless, are not therefore patient with my language acquisition. Though I had excitingly examine my course publications and experienced conversations in my own class, I experienced taken some things and terms when you look at the book for given perhaps not realizing they didn’t suggest just what it showed up they intended. Two associated with more tolerant people in our group arrived in to sooth me and explain in nicer terms just what everybody had gotten so upset about.